Friends!

What would I do with out my friends! I usually get the kids pictures done in the summer every year. But this year I just couldnt do it financially. So my bestie M also known to my kids as aunt M is going to to do some pictures for us this weekend! M has been thru think and thin with me. I cannot believe we have been friends for over 10 years now. Since highschool! She is deffinantly the sister that God forgot to give me. Plus we know to much about each other to not be friends! Hopefully we can get some pics up on monday.

4 months old

I cannot believe 4 months have flown by since Logan was born. He is doing great. Though he did have his first ear infection but since being on antibiotics is doing much better! We had his check this week and he wieghs in at 15 lbs 1 oz my little chunk and is 26 in long! He is wearing 6-9 months clothes and is starting to roll from back to front he can do front to back already. He also is starting to pull his knees up. I dont know if i am ready for him to be mobile yet! I am trying to enjoy every minute with him since he is my last :( but am looking forward to all the fun things i will beable to do when they get older!

talking to the gecko

4 Little blessings

In my last post i was so angry while i was writing. Angry for not understanding why God would give me four children to raise by myself angry that i can't make someone a father angry that I did not finish school before now. And then when i was done with the post my sweet Noah came in and out of nowhere gave me a hug and told me he loved me. It amazes me that God can soften our hearts just like that. A simple hug from a very sweet 5 year old nothing could be better. Each one of my four has taught me about life. Noah taught me its not all about me anymore. Wyatt taught me to laugh. Amelia has taught me patients she is my handful. Logan taught me to love life and embrace it.

they make me smile everyday

Frustration

Where do I start I am so frustrated with the family legal system it is not even funny. How is it that one parent gets to competley walk away from their responsiblities and there is absolutely nothing that can be done about it? And when I say walk away I mean walk away. I wish I could say i understand but I dont. How is it that you can completly disregaurad a court order for child support and think you can give how ever much you think is ok? Or how is it that you cant force someone to be a parent but yet I have to call everytime a child is sick or there is something going on at school. When in reality you dont care enough to call the school your self or even learn about your childrens disease. When I tell you I am calling my lawyers you laugh because you know you get away with everything. At what point will the legal system step in? Because they havent. Its not your problem when the kids get sick and one has to be in the hopital atleast thats what I hear. You cant because you have a cough screw the fact that your 4 month old is really sick. Or that your 3 year old has to go in to the hospital you dont even bother to call or to come get your other 2 kids and dont even know who they are staying with or that the people who have them had to take off work because you didnt care enough to. You can call everyday at the apointed time but that doesnt make you a parent. I stay up doing round the clock breathing treatments to 2 children while going to school and making sure that the one who can go to school is up and ready no matter how little sleep I get. I clean cook drive and am there emotionally for the kids. I am tired but yet I cannot take a day off. Its called being a parent! How dare you say poor baby about the baby when you are not willing to help out and come up with every excuse in the book why not to take the kids. How dare you pay a fourth of your financial responsiblity to your children and tell me you cant pay anymore because you are saving to buy a house! Grow up be a parent make the sacrifices!
Whew ok i am done ranting i just had to get that out! As you can see i am very frustrated! Thanks for letting me vent!

Baby Gear

Over at Kelly's Korner she is doing a show us your life baby stuff. I don't normally do these but i thought on this one i would.  Since i have teh 4 kids and all

My Favorite things:
The boppy especially if you are going to breastfeed. Though it did take me a while to get used to it.
Johnson & Johnson ready to use washcloths when they first come home
Bouncy chair is a must! or a swing is good too
if your baby has reflux the wedge are awsome
Recieving blankets they come in handy if your babies are big spitter uppers
Invest in a good pump
A playpen thats also a bassinet
A car seat stroller duo
Earths Best babyfood

My not so favorite things
A baby bath they dont use them for very long and the can be expensive. I put towels in the sink and elevate the head
Diaper Genie easier and less expensive to just throw it in the trash
Cheap diapers!
beachnut baby food none of my kids would touch it

After Baby is born dos and donts
Do turn your phone off for a week and leave on the machine all the important info
Dont turn away people willing to cook for you the first few weeks
Do tell people it not a good time to come visit no ones feelings will be hurt
Dont turn people down who want to babysit so you can get a nap or to to the store by yourself!
Do have people wash their hands before they touch the baby
Dont refuse hand me down baby clothes they can be so expensive

Thats really all I have for now.

Infusion days

I have never really talked about what happens during an infusion for the boys. There really is not much to it. We go to the clinc at our dr's office and see our wonderful nurse K! The boys both have ports so they do not have to get stuck everytime we go in. The ports are in there chest not too far below their collar bones. The do make life much easier. Then the boys get "accessed" and are given fluid then premeds like steriods and benadryl then they get their IVIG. 6 grams for Wyatt and 8 for Noah. It is an all day thing. We ge there about 10 and leave about 530ish. Then we do it all over again in 3 weeks!

lonely nights

I was watching Jon and Kate + 8 last night. Kate was talking about how lonely the nights can get. It struck a cord with me. They do get very lonely. I love my children more than anything but it is lonely not having somebody to share an adult conversation with. There is only so much you can tell a 5 year old that you don't want everyone knowing! But school does take up alot of my time now at night but its not the same ;) I am about to take my first test this week and am quite nervous about it! The kids are depending on me to do well in school and get a job! I also try to make it to the Y everyday to work off this baby wieght and to have some me time! My ex does not take the kids like he is suppose to so I am thankful that the Y offers parents night out! I am going to do the first one in October and hopefully get some early christmas shopping done. My goal is to be done by thanksgiving.... We will see how well that goes! I do have to add to this that i am so blessed to have my Mom. She has been my rock through this whole process! I honestly dont know what i would do with out her!